1980's, 1990's and Early 2000's
In the 1990s, GenX and some of the younger Boomers were tearing down gender barriers that typically happened in person. Women marched for equal rights, LGBTQ people came out to friends and family, and gender non-conforming individuals expressed themselves through fashion and community organizing. The work of breaking down gender norms was intimate, risky, and powerful. It required vulnerable face-to-face conversations, demonstrations in the streets, and pioneering cultural shifts in schools, workplaces, and homes.
1990s feminists talked about "girl power" and women's empowerment in response to patriarchal limitations. Online today, complex gender identities get lumped under umbrellas like "non-binary," assuming a universal shared experience. In the '90s, stereotypes were challenged through portrayals of bold, independent female characters in film and TV. Today, stereotypes spread rapidly through social media channels and get reinforced by influencer culture.
What Community Used to Mean
LGBTQ activism was grounded in a real community - demonstrations, protests, sit-ins, pride parades, direct action by ACT UP, and legal fights like overturning sodomy laws. While the internet offers community, critics point out that nothing replaces in-person support, breaking bread, and standing shoulder-to-shoulder. According to psychology professor Andrew Przybylski, while online connections provide wider access, relationships formed offline are of higher quality.
Community Today
Today, much of that work has shifted online. Social media allows people to join like-minded communities and share their identities with the world through posts and profiles. Dating apps give users dropdown menus to select their gender. Brands ask for pronouns in email signatures. And movements like #MeToo harness the power of the internet to increase visibility. But can these connections replace those made in the real world?
In some ways, this shift has created more opportunities for openness, connection, and activism around gender. Online spaces provide a digital community for those who feel isolated. Hashtags spread awareness of marginalized experiences. And digital media allows people to shape their self-expression and find platforms to share it. But do you really get to know these people, and are they really your friends?
Trade-offs
The truth is, we’ve lost a lot, too, with this shift. The nuance of face-to-face interaction can’t be replicated through screens. Reducing gender identity to dropdown menus and pronouns oversimplifies complex, deeply personal experiences. And the anonymity of online spaces sometimes fuels division rather than true connection across differences.
In a 2019 survey by Ipsos on behalf of Buzzfeed, only 16% of Americans said they ever discuss gender identity issues in person. But 70% said they actively engage with these topics online. This means conversations that require mutual understanding are instead happening through comments, tweets, and posts. It’s easy to categorize others when we don’t have to look them in the eye. Screens provide distance from humanity in each person’s story. So, in our pursuit of inclusivity, we risk reducing people to labels in order to understand them.
Final Thoughts
The internet does provide many tools for positive change that weren’t available 30 years ago. But real change requires a real human connection. If we want to break down barriers, we have to be willing to lean into challenging face-to-face conversations.
Reducing people to categories is easy online. But treating each other with dignity, compassion, and curiosity is something only humans can do together, face-to-face. The generation before us broke glass ceilings by having the courage to speak truth to power, person to person. If we want to build a more just and inclusive society, we must follow their example - online and in the real world.
