I'm hearing there is a backlash against selfies that’s taking hold today, and it’s not just from people who are sick and tired of seeing hundreds of self-promoting pics of, well …. nothing. In recent years, several organizations ranging from private for-profit companies to tourist destinations have implemented measures to control the stupid selfie snapper. In recent years Disneyland Paris and Hong Kong Disneyland took the lead from Disney’s U.S.-based theme parks by banning selfie sticks.
The Sistine Chapel in Italy and Palace Museum in Beijing have also banned them. The Coachella music festival in California, and the Lollapalooza festival in Chicago, have banned them too. In fact, Coachella’s rules echo the results of the latest survey by LendEdu: “No Selfie Sticks/No Narcissists.” These venues may be doing these selfie-lovers a service. People who post selfies on social networks like Instagram and Facebook are more likely to exhibit what some psychologists call the “dark triad” of personality traits, as documented in two previous studies of thousands of men and women who participated in the study. This dark triad consists of narcissism (extreme self-centeredness), Machiavellianism (manipulation of others), and psychopathy (acting impulsively with no regard for other people’s feelings), they noted.
Let's be real, though; no one is watching your every move on social media. Well, unless you're a Kardashian or have a super-obsessed fan. But for most of us normals, people aren't analyzing your posts that closely. I mean, do you really care if Becky used Valencia versus Nashville on her latest Instagram pic? Nah.
Social media has turned people into a bunch of self-conscious zombies glued to their phones. We agonize over each post, making sure it captures our best selfie angle and most profound shower thoughts. And don't even get me started on hashtags - slap a #adulting on there, and suddenly you're going viral among millions of fellow current relationship status: complicated folks.
It all comes down to this notion of "the other" that philosophers love debating over lattes. We shape our identity based on how others perceive us. Back in the day, this happened mostly face-to-face, but now social media is like a turbocharger for our self-awareness. One like from your old high school friend, and BOOM, your ego explodes.
Even just a hundred followers transform you into a mini influencer over-filtering everything for the fans. And when you tag a post with something like #foodie, you're envisioning a potential audience of millions analyzing your avocado toast.
Naturally, we assume every post could go viral, so we carefully curate our social media presence. Ironically, this makes what we share totally idealized - like a highlights reel of our best moments looking flawless. Even the anti-social media crowd compulsively posts about not posting. We're all trapped in a vortex of self-doubt and comparing ourselves to others' feeds.
Moral of the story: don't obsess over the perfect selfie for Insta. Chances are, everyone else is too wrapped up in their own posts to notice if you go filter-free. So use that Valencia filter without shame and move on with your life. The only person judging your ice cream choices is you.
